21 months v 4 months v 34 years!

21 months v 4 months v 34 years baby and mama update

These past couple of months have really had me questioning my life choices. The first baby was unplanned but the second was not! I knew I wanted to have babies close in age so they could be friends and play together. I didn’t realise, or was deliberately obtuse, as to how much my life would change with 2 under 2! Thankfully we’re coming out of the really stressful period into a somewhat more relaxed and enjoyable time. Aasiya is 21 months, learning to talk in sentences and really beginning to appreciate her surroundings and understand her role in her environment. She’s fun and charming and usually a total delight to hang out with.Idris is also out of the delicate baby stage, he can hold his head up, is curious about his surroundings and can amuse himself for some length of time in his bouncer without wanting me to carry or feed him! I know the terrible twos are around the corner for Aasiya and Idris will be teething soon, so I’m going to make the most of these few peaceful weeks while I can!

Aasiya is 21 months and I think if I didn’t have Idris I’d still see her as my baby. However she’s had to adapt to not being the baby and she’s taken to that challenge wonderfully. The more intune with language she becomes the more she picks up on me calling baby certain things that she considers only for herself i.e. I call her my moon and stars so if I ever call baby Idris anything she’ll say “no, me moon” and she’ll get really upset if I ever call him my moon!

We live between two houses so it’s hard to implement a routine but I think that’s important for toddlers so I try and ensure we have certain rules and routines that she follows. The simple ones are 1. We only eat at the dining table, where she has her own chair (in both houses) 2. Tidy up after each activity before beginning the next. So she has to tidy her colouring books before getting the play dough out or any other toys. And finally 3. We always start bedtime at 8pm. Bedtime in our household involves, teeth brushing, nappy change, story and then sleep. We do have other rules, such as indoor and outdoor shoes, we’re learning to say please and thank you and I allow her 1 tv programme a day (usually on my laptop or iPad). Another key rule in our household is that Aasiya isn’t allowed to play with phones or iPads as we don’t feel they’re for children. I think having these little things really helps toddlers form some sort of understanding about themselves and the space they occupy. Other than the phone rule, we’re not especially strict about enforcing them, there are no consequences other than mummy and daddy being upset but still she seems to respect them for the most part. Aasiya is a stubborn little lady and really knows her own mind, which as a woman I respect but as her mother I sometimes struggle with! I don’t believe in relying to strongly on developmental charts as I think all children are different and get to milestones in their own time but if you’re interested in seeing what a 21 month old “should” be able to do you can here. To give you some perspective on this, Aasiya asks why correctly (annoyingly!!), can name lots of body parts and jumps. She doesn’t however know how to throw a ball over arm, go down stairs and isn’t ready for a big bed!

Idris is now 4 months and seems to be doing really well. It’s hard not to compare especially since they’re so close in age and therefore so fresh on my mind. Aasiya at this age was sitting up but not rolling, in fact I don’t think she ever rolled or wiggled the way Idris does, however Idris isn’t able to sit up!! He does hold his head up, makes lots of sounds and recognises voices, all things Aasiya did at a later stage than him. So even babies born into the same environment meet milestones at their own time. I’m not bothered that Idris isn’t sitting up I know he will when the time’s right. He is a massive wriggler and roller so I have to be extremely careful where I leave him, something I never had to worry about with Aasiya. He is quite a bit bigger than Aasiya was at his age and already in size 4 nappies. For the most part he is really easy going, he doesn’t fuss at bathtimes, naps well, drinks his milk with no fuss and generally isn’t a crying baby. Unfortunately he has taken to waking up earlier in the morning than Aasiya and I, around 6.30am, when we are used to waking up after 8am! For a look at developmental milestones for a 4 month old this website is very good.

I’m now just over 4 months postpartum and generally feeling well. I haven’t weighed myself in ages but I feel like I’ve lost most of the weight, minus my mum pouch. I’ve started March with the intention of doing 35 minutes of exercise everyday before my 35th birthday at the end of the month! I’m praying that will help me lose the final stubborn bits of fat still lingering. I don’t think I’ve had any major emotional breakdowns with Idris the way I did with Aasiya, but then I think the first baby is a real shock to the system & this time I was much better prepared. I do feel like I’m getting restless at home, I need to find some other activity to occupy my headspace that doesn’t revolve around babies! It’s been a bit harder this time possibly due to the time of year and the extremely cold weather spells we’ve had, which have meant I’ve been indoors much more than I’d have liked. I’m also hoping to wean Idris a bit sooner that I did Aasiya as I think he needs a bit more than the breastmilk he is getting, maybe it will result in longer periods of sleep too! I’m going to look into weaning at 4 months and see how I feel. I will continue to breastfeed him though.

This has become quite a lengthy post so I’ll leave it at that. We’ve been really busy in the last couple of weeks with family and home stuff which I will be updating you all on soon. Leave a comment below to let me know how you managed with these exciting developmental stages or if you have this to look forward to, I always love receiving your comments 😘

Peace and love

Mina ✌🏾


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